I am a talker. Have been since birth. Because of that, I have had some struggles throughout my life. I should add that I am an opinionated talker. Yikes! An opinionated talker with a gift for sarcasm. Sounds hopeless, doesn’t it?
Then, one day, I was gathering quotes for a lesson and found this one:
“Better to be silent and be thought of as a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.” – Abraham Lincoln
Ouch!!
Then I went to the scriptures and found this in Proverbs 13:3:
“The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; the one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.” I decided it was time to clamp down on that tongue. I know you are asking, “what does that have to do with showing love?”
Let’s go to the words of Jesus in Matthew 12:34-37:
“You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. The good man out of his good treasure brings forth what is good, and the evil man out of his evil treasure brings forth what is evil. And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgment. For by your words, you shall be justified, and by your words, you shall be condemned.”
Then in Luke 6:45, we hear Jesus saying the same thing, but Luke shares it a little differently, ending with: “for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.”
We have looked in previous articles that the 2 greatest commands are to love God and love others.
Matthew 22:37-40…
“And He said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, you shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
If my heart is filled with a love for God and a love for others, then my words toward them will be filled with love.
It can be difficult to guard your tongue. We live in a world that tells us that we have the right to express every thought that rolls through our brains…just look at social media. Social media has made it easy for us to comment on, correct, and condemn anyone and everyone we want to without looking them in the eyes. How many times have you posted something and then, after further thought, went back and deleted it?
That’s practicing Proverbs 15:28:
“The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.”
Our words are powerful!! Just go read the book of James. It is all about the power of the tongue. You can start in chapter 3 if you want to, but read the rest of the book and tie it to the tongue. God is truly concerned with how we use our tongues because what we say either lifts up or tears down others.
If we truly love others, we will be guarding our tongues and use them to lift others up. My husband, Wayne, taught me to use 1 Corinthians 13:4-6, as a way to guard my tongue.
We replace the word “love” with “words.” Let me show you.
-
My words will be patient. – I will think before I speak and not just rush to voice my opinion. I won’t be reactive with my words.
-
My words will be kind. – If they aren’t kind, I won’t use them.
-
My words don’t show envy. – For example, I wish I had that. Her hair isn’t that pretty…because you’re jealous. Or any other words that tear someone down just to lift you up.
-
My words don’t boast.
-
My words aren’t proud. – “Don’t boast” and “Aren’t proud” seem a lot alike to me. This is when you talk continually about yourself. You’ve been in those kinds of conversations before. The “I did”, “I do, “me,” “me,” and “me”.
-
My words aren’t unbecoming, or they don’t dishonor others. – Gossip would fit in this category or any type of discouraging words.
-
My words aren’t self-seeking. – Do you use your words for flattery so that you are seen better? When we love others, we want to know more about them, not share everything we have an opinion on so that they know how “smart” we are.
-
My words aren’t easily angered. – Do I really need to explain this one? Guard that tongue. We love others.
-
My words don’t keep track of wrongs. – Do we use our words in a judgmental manner, thinking we are helping someone “grow”? “Now remember when you….”
-
My words don’t like evil. – We avoid all forms of conversation that change how we see others. We love others.
-
My words rejoice with the truth. – We share the wonderful truth that we see in others. We share it with them, and we share it with others. “I love that you are so good with children.” “I love that she is always caring for others in a way that no one sees.”
We want to be sharing our love with our words!
Proverbs 12:18…
“There is one who speaks rashly like the thrust of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
People around you need healing. They don’t need to be torn apart with harsh words, even when you are using God’s words. We need to be sharing the love!!
Let me encourage you to print out the 1 Corinthians 13 verses above and hang them on your mirror or beside your bed. Keep them close to your heart so that you can be transformed in the way that you share your love with your words.
And by the way, I am on an upward journey of controlling that tongue. I’m better now, all because of Jesus and the love I have for Him and others, but I still have a ways to go.